How to Talk to Your Spouse Who Says You Work Too Much

Strong marriages and relationships require attention from both partners. This balance of attention to spouse versus earning a living or furthering your career can be difficult to find. And, once you have found a balance that works in your relationship, things change and you have to find the balance again.

Why do some people overwork? The Overworking Spouse may be under considerable stress on the job, or may have a boss that demands long hours. Or maybe there are layoffs coming up and the less productive workers are the first to go. Maybe one partner has to work long hours just to support the family. On the other hand, the overworking spouse may be strongly identifying with career advancement to the exclusion of the marriage. Of course, we should be involved in work that is worthwhile, fulfilling and financially rewarding but over focus can put the marriage at risk.

What can happen when you put your work/career first? Your spouse may be feeling emotionally disconnected from you and lonely. There may be a buildup of resentment which can lead to anger and finally bitterness-towards you. This situation often leads to unhappiness and discord for the entire family.

As a psychologist who has worked for 20 years counseling couples in my therapy practice in North St. Paul, MN, I met with Amy and Josh with just this complaint. Amy was complaining that she was overburdened because Josh worked too much and left her with the responsibilities of home, children, and her own 40-hour job. He knew she was right but he felt defensive when she tried to tell him how to manage his work schedule. He’d started complaining that when wasn’t very affectionate lately and always blamed her disinterest in their physical intimacy on fatigue. He asked to meet with me individually after Amy had had a session to talk about her “side”of the problem. He was appreciative that she was not as naggy as she had been in the past, but he still felt blamed and criticized.

When Josh and I met, we talked of the reasons that he was spending so much time at work. The usual reasons people overwork is that they are feeling under considerable stress on the job, or may have a boss that demands long hours. Or maybe there are layoffs coming up and the less productive works are the first to go. Maybe one partner has to work long hours just to support the family. On the hand, the overworking spouse may be strongly identifying with career advancement to the exclusion of the marriage.

Drs. John and Julie Gottman, in their book 10 Lessons to Transform Your Marriage, suggest the following questions:

1.What does your work mean to you?

2.What pleasure or satisfaction does work bring to you?

3.What need does working fulfill in your life?

4.Does your work related to some personal legacy you would like to contribute to the world?

In a discussion with Josh, he pointed out that he was trying to make headway in his career now, while he was still young and had the energy. He knew his wife was doing a good job parenting their two small children (3 years and 9 months) so he wanted to focus on earning good money for his family. At first, he couldn’t understand why Amy was complaining so much because he was doing all this work for her and their children. He felt it was his responsibility. He wanted to provide his children with a fund for their education.

I suggested he consider the questions listed above. He said that his work is very satisfying in that he felt very confident and capable at work. He also wanted to meet his father’s expectations who had had a successful career. His older two brothers had moved from job to job and he knew his father was disappointed that they had difficulty supporting their families.

It was important for Josh to understand the underlying reasons for his excessive hours at work. He did not have a demanding boss and he was in no threat of a layoff. He just wanted to do the right thing. He had not thought of himself as having value over and above that of a worker and wage earner. He resigned himself to have a discussion with Amy. He said he would try to listen carefully about what Amy was longing for when she complained to him. I suggested he try to imagine the experiences she wanted to have with him and not to focus on her criticisms.

When Amy and Josh came for the next couple’s session, they wanted to further discuss the overworking situation. (They no longer saw the problem as residing inside one of them but as a problem the two of them need to figure out.) Any was able to explain to him what she missed when he work so much. He came to get a sense that his contribution to their family was not solely a financial responsibility. He heard her tell him he was also loved, appreciated, and needed as a friend, confidant and co-parent. She especially enjoyed his easy humor with their children and felt he was the only one who would be able to provide that.

This was a difficult issue for this couple and it was not resolved quickly. They were able to discuss their needs and wants in a different way when they addressed the questions about the underlying reasons for their positions.

The Basic Facts of Web Design For Online Business

Designing a suitable website plays an extremely crucial part in promoting your online business on a professional level. Possessing a website which also appears good on a smartphone or tablet is vital to continue to keep your company competitive. To do this, your website should be clean, with simple navigation, and a look and feel that's simple to follow for an improved user experience.

Website design needs a lot of creativity. An appealing design of the site is the secret, which will bring in lots of possible clients. An excellent site design can take your organization graph to new heights. It's a neat compact design that may fit even in little spaces and is made entirely in the United States, to guarantee quality and support.

Since you'll be leaving the designing of your website to a company, choose a web design company who employs the newest technology to keep your website on top of the competition. Apart from that you could also locate a great company which could offer security solutions for your business enterprise.

Without this, another business will quickly replace your business. While you're looking for the web design company that is most suitable for you, do not fail to review about the organization's name, reputation and company policies. It's often hard to secure a web design company with expertise in excellent ecommerce programming, it is not impossible. So now you've found one of the best ecommerce website design firms.

The websites are created quite user friendly. The websites are completely designed and developed using WordPress or similar CMS platform and it is the ideal platform inside this arena. Submitting to business directories increase your small business site's search engine optimization (search engine optimization), meaning that it's going to be simpler for customers to discover your business through search engines.

If you would like your site to perform and generate leads for increased sales, your company will need far more than merely a site. If you own a site but not satisfied then it is possible to get help from reputed web design firm to get rid of same. The intriguing part about this site is it does not really comply with the tides of the fashion world, but instead intends to earn a mark of its own. It's through getting your own site. You can do all these by getting your own website which works.

Your site is a direct reflection of your online business. Whenever your website is ready and accessible seamlessly across different mobile devices, then your website will become greater engagement medium and a greater rate of retention. Not only does this increase your small business website's SEO, in addition, it keeps people interested in your company by giving them fresh content to view on a regular basis. Submitting to local small business directories is another great way to market your small business website.

Each website is customized to their requirements. Many companies web sites have a bad position in search engine rankings, or may not be listed at all because they do not understand how search engines work. Furthermore, maintaining your site content relays the message that you're keeping your company techniques updated and keeps your small business image polished, in turn winning over new customers.

Imagine having your customers see your site, simply to discover that parts of your site are broken. To attain success, a website bought to be designed under the umbrella of one team. Your website is optimized for search engines to ensure it is simple for your clients to find you. In the modern technology-driven world, your website is often the very first impression of your company and have to capture the user's attention instantly. A website, with fast and straightforward location search, was also a necessity for local business.

How To Search Google For Country Specific Results

Running an international online business with the capability to service people from any country means that you want your site to perform well not only in local country specific results but also global results. You may not realize this but doing a standard Google search and leaving the "full web" option selected does not necessarily give you your website's true location in the Google global results. It gives you the global results given your location.

For example, the results of doing a full web search in my home city of Brisbane Australia will be different to a full web search from Toronto Canada.

Google gives results based on your location even when you are not stipulating a local result. You can click your local country only result button and get sites that are from your home country, usually determined by the domain name extension, for example .com.au for Australia, .ca for Canada, etc. or the IP address of your web hosting server, or you can click the web option and get global Internet results that vary depending on your computer's location in the world (based on the IP address of the computer you are using to access the Internet).

Think Global

If your business can service the world then you really can not ignore the American marketplace, or if you are in the USA do not forget about Europe, Asia and the rest. Since you need to know how well your site is performing in Google global search results and unfortunately simply ticking the "the web" option in Google when searching can be misleading because your ranking will be different if it was someone in a different country doing the exact same search.

What you want to know is when someone in the UK does a Google search for one of your terms, how high is your website up in the search results? With this little trick you can figure it out.

The Code

All you need to do is add & gl = uk to the URL at the end of the Google search query.

For example:

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=sample+query&meta= & gl = uk

This tells Google to spit out the results for the query based on UK servers.

I can not guarantee 100% conclusively that this works as I expect it does, but it definitely does something and you should try it yourself and see if your site shows up in a different place in the results. The "gl" stands for G eographic L ocation and of course you can exchange the last letters to test different country results around the world.

Internet Marketing – The Basic Step of SEO in “Off Page Optimization”

SEO or Search Engine Optimization it the most important thing in Internet Marketing. It is the way of website optimization, sometimes how to be search engine friendly, so our site can appear on the first page of search results on the search engines, and so we can get free traffic from search engines.

SEO has 2 important phases:

  1. Optimization on the site itself (On-page Optimization)
  2. Optimization beyond the site (Off-page Optimization)

This time I will describe what is "off-page optimization".

What is Off-Page Optimization?

In a simple word Off-Page Optimization is the activities we do on our site with the goal of creating robots that search engines rate sites our site is famous among other sites. This is also known as "Link Popularity"

How famous our site among the other sites (with a particular target keyword) will be a consideration in determining search engine positioning of our site in search engine result.

Based on the experience of internet marketers who have been successful, Off-Page Optimization is very important now, even that says Off-Page Optimization is much more important than the On-Page Optimization. But I think both of them are important to get a high ranking on search engines.

The main components of the Of-Page Optimization, or to determine how famous our site is through the quality back links. So if you want the robot is considered as a famous site we need to have a lot of quality back links.

Back Link have 2 types:

1. One direction or One Way Back Link, where other site link to our site, but our site does not link back to the site. This is usually our sites have information that is considered interesting and he recommended to the visitor of their site.

2. Two-way (mutual link). Also known as "Link Exchange" or exchange links. Note that One Way Back Link has a wine better on search engine than two-way link.

Which link back is good for the Off-Page Optimization?

Many webmasters make the mistake and has wrong mind with Back Link. They tried to find link partners as much as possible without examining the positions, topic and status of the site which will be invited to become their Link-Partner.

To avoid this the following steps are necessary to find a quality Back Link:

1. When searching for potential link partners, select the same site, or at least close to the topic or topics related to our site.

2. Search site potential link partners with high-rank page.

3. When we do Link Exchange see where they will put the link. Usually they have a special page for Link Partner, see the page rank of the special page, either they have a high page rank or not. This is very important.

Note: Page Rank of each page of your site in one domain can be different. Although the main page has a high Page Rank, the other Page Rank can be lower or even zero. Or the Page Rank of the main page is lower but the other pages inside is higher. This can be caused by the On-Page Optimization and Link Back obtained by the page.

Conclusion:

– Do not exchange links with the other sites with different theme. – Do not link sites that has Page Rank 0 – When you want to Link Exchange, do not accept the link of our site is putting in the page with Page-Rank 0

4. Calculate how many link partners were there! Do not try to link the sites that have links Partner or save more than 50 links on one page!

Note: Value of Page Rank will be divided evenly with all of the existing link partners. More number of link partners that are stored in one page, the smaller Rank value will receive by each link partner.

5. Look at Anchor Text used for our site at the site of link partners, is already in line with our target keyword? Anchor Text must be the keyword of our target.

Many Webmasters are looking for Link Partner as much as possible without considering the above. Actually we do not need to find thousands of links to sites we create are considered by a robot, just looking for 30-60 quality links that are eligible that have been described above.

The Main points of the Off-Page Optimization:

1. Try the link + description of our website are there in the other sites, this is called the Back Links.

2. There are two kinds of Back Links: One Way Back Links (one-way link) and Link Exchange (exchange link).

3. For Link Exchange, search for related theme site.

4. Search potential site link partners that has high Page-Rank. Download Google toolbar http://toolbar.google.com to know the Page Rank of a site. When is found contact them to exchange links.

5. If they agree, check where the link is placed, see the Page Rank page, do not accept a link placed on the page Rank 0.

6. Calculate how many links that are posted on there, do not link to a site that has a link partner of more than 50 links in one page.

7. Always use the Anchor Text, the site's main keywords should be used the description of the link on the site of link partner.

Note: Although we have done all the above correctly, free traffic from search engines will not come immediately, but takes time. Give time 5 months to 1 year to see the results. While waiting for the results we can make another site. Remember, SEO is the most important thing in Internet Marketing .